Pointed Nipple Rally
24th January 1992 - Free Spirit Riders MCC
This was one rally at which you were assured to see at least one naked breast. In fact, pretty much all the people had one on display! This was what they used for the badge, with the nipple changing colour each year.
I had attended the club's summer rally previously, so I knew roughly how to find the Willowbrook Sport & Social Club in Billericay where the rally was held. There was a well-stocked bar at the site, in an amusing brick-built feature, but most of the afternoon activity was centred at the pub down the road, as they served reasonably priced meals. Although the club was a sturdy building, it took a while for the interior to warm up, which was another prompt to use the pub as much as possible. It was enjoyable enough when it got going, though.
On Saturday morning one of the Clubhouse co-owners, the Rugby Club, were having a match, during which the majority of those attending turned up. The rest of my club, (Roadster section of the WMAMCC), and a fair turnout from the Ogri MCC, who were quite local to us, both made their appearance, The Ogri having mostly customised bikes, (one of which needed a bit of tinkering), and a couple of trikes, one of which pulled a rather large trailer tent. Someone was seen who didn't need such fripperies as a tent and had slept under a polythene sheet draped between his bike and the hedge.
One of our guys was wearing a horribly bright red woolly hat, which the rest of us decided needed christening in the muddy field. When the Rugby guys got out of the way, the silly games could commence. Our combined heavyweights acquitted themselves well in the Tug-of-war as well as the Dizzy Sticks. There followed a bit of muddy-field wrestling before we went into the evening clubhouse session.
Our Neville had announced at the start that he was going to pace himself. He managed to get paced quite quickly, and flashed his bits around for a while before collapsing into a pile of his own vomit at around 8pm. Well paced!
One of the organisers thought I needed to get a snap of a pair of real breasts. And the evening went on from there, much as expected, including some fire walking.
One of the Ogri trikes needed some tinkering to start on Sunday, including some jump-starting help from a transit. It still didn't sound quite right to me, but what do I know? Our ride home was crisp and brisk, and we even had the chance of popping into the club's meeting place for a lunchtime drink on the way home.
- Phil (the Spill) Drackley